Thursday, July 3, 2008

SEX......LIES....and contraception

contraception a term most used by my mom .........(she is a gyneacologist )......and least used by half of india ... actually more than half ..... if contraceptives were used ... then hum do hamare do wudve been a success beyond successes ..... contraception is such a funny word .... it is so weirdly hushed about actually even more then SEX is .... people are petrified of going to a shop and saying bhai sahab ek "kunddoooom"dena .... than telling their girl "baby aaj kuch mazaaa hojaaye".... :D ... dont mind the horrid descriptions of role imaginations that are "semi porno scenes" vividly zoooming around in ur head as u read it ... why i talk about contraception .... i met a friend who knows a friend who has a kid now because she didnt use "covering "...:D dats what they called it then... she had a son who just celebrated his 5th birthday ..... reasons why i write it is because "she"... has missed out on the best part of life ..since she was too busy .... cleaning diapers .. and teaching nursery rhymes .. and watching pogo with him ......*shocked*.. yeah i was tooo because that woman was from my school ...... she was an "exam room same roll number different class"mate ..... and she was this reallly funny girl who had a certain aloofness some envied and some hated...... she as alll girls her age had fallen "in true love"(ok no one in 8th class fallls in true "loosing virginity:lou ")......ya so she was head over heels flipping about his guy ..... who was (not)crazy about her too ....... he wanted his raging hormones to have an outlet .... and who better than miss "dreams about marriage"girl who liked him .... welll the numbskull did his job ... the catch ..."he missed sex ed class in school"... moral of the story .... they just celebrated the kids 5th birthday ....and funny part ..... the guy "paternal chromosome bearer"..... isnt even married to her ... he is flirting with some other tunic wearing chick waiting to enter "u know where"....................
next story .... i am sure ur wondering "how in the world does she hear shit like this "... welll helloooo "girls school"......:P...... yeah this friend of mine ...has been seeing this guy(sad...is his name:P).... for a reallly long time ... literally since they were born :d .. ok no not that long .... yeah but still since times immemorial .... :d........ and he asks her one day that since she knows they r gonna get married they should do it ... our dear woman who fell for the sweet talk says yes ... GIVES IN ... and ok fine ... he did use protection ... but she lost it......lost that one thing women wait to loose when they have their "suhhaaaag raaat"...hers came a little early ...... :P..... ok so now is the crazy part ... our dear lady had some check up to go for ... goes there and the doctor asked her ... when did u loose ur virginity and she says i am a virgin ........ *ur thinking idiot *... dats what i thought too ...... she lied through her damned front teeth ... and the lie was so loud .... half of hyd heard it .... so did her mom ...... so second moral ...... dont lie when u have been "done"...... and not to a DOCTOR for godsake .......
well so long for now .... i guess i have rattled on enough .... my hands need a break from the slow hits the keyboard really hard typing .. and my brain needs some sleep ...... so aurevoir ..... and GEAR UP before u suddenly "cheer up"...:P:P...
ok some ppl (ahem ahem ) needed morals so here goes
1. Try ... try not to loose ur virginity till u r married off by ur parents then it becomes legal :P
2. if u do loose it .... try loosing it with someone who is worth it ... no i dont mean .. oh my god he is so cute, rich worth it ... i mean the pig who doesnt just do it bcoz he wants an OUTLET ..... loose it with the one who thinks u r beautiful and who tells u he wants u only for the rest of his life (caution=sweet talkers and liars are not included)
3. USE CONTRACEPTIVES.........
4. just realise there is much much more to life than just SEX ...... fornication i agree is an important part of life ... its not the only part .... so for now EAT CHOCOLATES AND DRINK COFFEE......and smile .... AUREVOIR

9 comments:

jona said...

nice.... superb post ... so now i want to know moral of the story/post... -
1. use contraceptives
2. dont loose virginity
3. dont lie to a doctor that u havent lost virginity

hehe ... welll ... nicely put ... just need to contain the whole post in a better way... or jus leave it as it is ... its nice...

...643... said...

:p:p...ailaaa wat happend t da conservative traditional religion addicted parents fearing society scared youth????...nd yea u rite ds nd sm activist s gonna file a case on u...she violated da code f conduct article no 54 1948 as mentioned n da indian consitution...as t s mentioned n da article nd accordin t our dear so called actists protecting national intrests nd tradition no1s supposd t discuss abt sex...ts a sinful wrd n a country wich wrote kamasutra..:P..luk at khusbho(watevr da spelling mayb)...newayz very gud 1...ppl r actualy scared t write smthng lik ds..wat -vl-they-think-f-me-f-i write-such-a-thing kind:P

shuuuu said...

to jon ... hehe i can never contain anything in particular in one place .......... so post containing ke liye will but container ... :d... how was that for a pj ..... heheheheh .... anywayyyyy thank u ...... and the threee morals are alll right ..... but the second one is best ... dont looose virginity tilll he is the man u know who is gonnna be urs for lifeeeeeeeeeeeeee.......... thank u thank u thank u :)

shuuuu said...

heheh to srikar ...... the traditional parents fearing youth is the majority existing or rather coexisting with the youth who is waiting to di it .. or is doing it ... as i type this ... :D.... heheh u know the activists first shud check blog .... and when they do .... we willll take ur karisma and run over them .... :D ... then we will have a reason valid enuff to be put into jail ..... hehehehe ...... actually speaking we r insane enuff to be in already :P.... hehehe but thank u thank u ... and u should know more than anyone ... i am not the "oh my god what will happen if i write it ".... more like the ..oh my god .. i cant believe i didnt write it till now should write it types "..... hehehehehhehehe

vj8 said...

mast write up,
the best is towards the end,
I bet if any one can find out if its "the one who thinks u r beautiful and who tells u he wants u only for the rest of his life (caution=sweet talkers and liars are not included)"
write a guide book for that, and u have a best seller, :D
on a serious note I will put a banner on my blog; "Use Contraception"
are, now I remember I have a mast psm on this, some day will put it to work, a print design.

shuuuu said...

heheheh thank u thank u thank u ........ and yes psm ka help u want i dont mind ... actuallly any help in stuff like this i dont mind ....... :P.....thank u thanks a lot ... hope u r goood ... and heheh guide book ..... sure sure pulitzer prize winner ... :P..... hope psm works out

Divya said...

SEX is not a four letter word..contraception is a thirteen letter bad word alright!..

i am surprised how the young adults who seem to know everything about downloads and software.. have not even a clue about their own HARD ware!...[pun definitely intended!]
forget pregnancies... have you ever thought of herpes?? gonorrhea?? syphyllis?.. chlamydia. these are diseases that your partner can give you.. and are very much alive and kicking.. and not to forget AIDS!! ]

the persons past sexual history is never written on their faces.. so everytime you indulge in so called freedom of the teenager.. you may be putting your adulthood in jeopardy..

as you said.. there is so much more to life than sex... and as john milton said.. they also serve who only stand and wait... so wait.. for the right person..the right time..

and as for sex??when the right time comes[ preferably when you are 28!!=] .. DONT CONDEMN IT ... BUT DEFINITELY...CONDOM IT!..

Chitra said...

wow ash..............you sure speak like your mom ..........and Divi when you write all those gross diseases you are putting Young Adults OFF SEX forever.........chocolates seems to be a better option he he he he he he
anyhow yenjoyyyyy kanna

Jiji said...

heya....must say...quite a gud article..